Month: December 2024

I see the light reflected

from the broken, jagged edges

and I’m captured by the patterns

I can just almost discern

as you shift and turn so quietly

that no else will notice

you try to disappear again

but somehow my eyes find you

still lost in the moments 

as they rise to overwhelm

consuming you as you seem

to have consumed me

captured by the chaos

that you fight to seal away

but those patterns and reflections

those torn and tattered corners

of the tapestry that brought you here

are what draws me in like moth to flame

and I can’t help but bleed myself

on some jagged edges of my own

Long past the point in time to be the bigger man

so far over worrying about how someone else might feel

done with the dismissal and devaluation

not backing down this time just to clear the air

no longer taking any responsibility

for how someone else might feel or act or be

stepping out from under decades

of being treated like I’m just the child

ignorant and barely wanted

always lying, always wrong

I’m done with backing down,

seen but not heard I believe they say

well sorry but I won’t apologize for speaking up 

when I’ve been trapped for most my life

under the weight of the lack of self-esteem

crushed by all the mocking and the threats and bluster

and no you can’t just walk right in and make me take it back to fix it

when it’s been broken for almost forever

and now suddenly someone else is cut

by the jagged edges they themselves created

I wonder who will notice when I’m gone

not that it matters I suppose

if this were the end would I

have left behind anything worthwhile?

It’s all so pointless and pathetic and meaningless

no one ever asks to be born

and yet we suffer and struggle through it all

for what?

Maybe I’ll find out soon…